With this blog comes the hopes and dreams that it will serve multiple purposes.
The first and most significant purpose is to serve as an avenue toward healing the pain that many children of families of violence still carry with them in their adult lives.
Secondly, it will provide educational material. As you make your journey, hopefully you will find the support here of others who have made or who are in the process of making this same journey. The tools and the support that you will need can be found here.

Be aware the content of this blog is in no way "Dressed Up". This blog, like family violence itself, is not a walk in the park. Here the reality is faced both past and present!

Content will be added to this blog as it is made available.


Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Child Of Violence

~Unborn Child~
wondrous new life in mother's womb;
jolted and awakened by her fear,
head and ears bombarded, again, by the sound
waves of familiar angry voices in the night;

~Newborn Child~
grasping at the sides of your crib,
holding on for dear life;
eyes searching for the danger;
terrified by the "hurricane"
of violent arguments which surround you.

~Precious Toddler~
crying heartily as you watch parents battle;
arms outstretched;
needing comfort, wanting peace;
feeling powerless to stop the war
between "the giants."

~Frightened Child~
seeing lives threatened and loved ones degraded,
fearing your own destruction;
tender nervous system already shot;
left alone to cope with
the repeated shocks of a parent's rage.

~Sleeping Child~
rudely awaken, time and time again;
innocent victim, kept awake for hours,
tortured by the fearful sights and sounds
of grown-up fury.

~Hurting Child~
feeling so alone and so scared;
wanting to cry - all the time;
no one to tell, no one to help;
knowing by age 6
what it feels like to want to die.

~Vigilant Child~
ever watchful;
reading your parent/abuser's every sign;
learning how to keep out of harm's way;
not daring to sleep
until the dust had settled.

~Shamed Child~
embarrassed by the family violence,
head and spirit already lowered in shame; f
eeling like a failure,
unable to save those you love
from the batterer's wrath.

~Uneasy Child~
never knowing when the storm
will hit or when it will end;
growing up in chaos;
unfamiliar with words like
"tranquil," "stable,"
"relaxed," or "carefree."

~Courageous Child~
witness to abuse most people never experience;
routinely overcoming terror,
your strength paid for
by all the pain you have known.

~"Empty" Grown-up Child~
without a sense of self;
told by parents that you didn't count;
feeling like you don't matter;
relying on other people
and "things" for a sense of value.

~Guilty Grown-up Child~
in whom self-hatred has resided;
So guilt-ridden that you did whatever
you could to survive
while others suffered
~ in a holocaust called home.

~Lonely Grown-up Child~
so isolated;
feeling like no one can understand
what it was like and how much it hurt;
Fearing that the war,
deep in your memory,
will never go away.

~Angry Grown-up Child~
left to recover;
So hurt by parental neglect;
struggling to work through emotions
distorted long ago; learning to trust;
learning to forgive
~ them and yourself;
learning self-respect;
and, learning how to resolve conflicts
without violence or abuse.

Copyright 1992 by Barbara Corry.
Used by permission.
Thank you Barb

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